Leadership and Listening

Discovery:

Tomorrow, spend some time on the sidelines during CVICU rounds and watch how people interact with each other. You will notice that there are two distinct listening patterns. ‘Listening to Respond’ and ‘Listening to Understand’. Awareness of these two patterns offers a relatively easy way to improve your performance as a leader.

Real life example (CVICU rounds):

At the first bedside, an Intensivist began providing the group with a rundown of the prior evening’s events, only to be cutoff midsentence by an impatient surgeon. The discussion rapidly shifted direction (with the original story half untold, leaving important data outside the team’s awareness). Further interruptions from multiple other participants ensued and the discussion essentially ricocheted from point to point without resolution of some important core issues. “Ricochet” conversations undermine the effectiveness of ICU rounds and are a direct result of “Listening to Respond”. When we are in this listening mode, we start off listening but rapidly growing internal pressure to interject causes us to interrupt with a statement that typically drives the conversation in a new direction.

At the next bedside, however, I noticed a different pattern of listening. Another clinician was very patient and attentive when listening and tended to hear people out without interruption. During a pause in the conversation, when this listener spoke, the group fell completely silent and did not interrupt. The group seemed to instinctively know that this individual was worth listening to. Interestingly, this listener tended to respond with a question to gain more information from the speaker and enriched the understanding of the entire group. This special type of clinician listens in a different manner: They “Listen to Understand” and their response is highly valued by the group.

Listening to Understand is an important skill for team leaders and, with some self-awareness, is an easy skill to build. When Listening to Understand, the listener must tamp down their natural tendency to burst with a response and actually…listen to a speaker —through an entire thought, from start to finish. Pausing a few seconds to reflect on what was said helps to internally process the newly received thoughts and, importantly, demonstrates to the speaker (and team) that you were actually listening. After a pause, someone who Listens to Understand will typically respond with a question to gain better understanding—or with a comment that amplifies the speaker’s point and places it within new context. Listening to Understand maximizes the value of information being discussed. It is easy to do and will add a new dimension to your leadership skills at CVICU rounds – or anywhere else you are interacting with others.

These two modes of listening are easy to identify and, if you pay attention, you will notice that you shift back and forth between the two modes. On honest introspection, I recognized that I am far too often Listening to Respond and am consciously disciplining myself to spend more time Listening to Understand. Awareness of these two patterns has helped me to improve.

For fun, I dare you to try a few things TOMORROW:

1. Watch for these two listening patterns in CVICU rounds tomorrow morning (and at your dinner table tomorrow night). Pay attention to these patterns, call it out when you see it, and modify your behavior accordingly.

2. Catch yourself the next time you are Listening to Respond, close your mouth and open your mind, and deliberately shift to Listen to Understand. You will learn something - and maximally leverage the talent within your team!

For more perspective, please listen to a highly recommended podcast in the Coaching for Leaders series hosted by Dave Stachowiak and interviewing Ruth Gotian on ‘How to be a Better Mentor’.